| | I was standing outside polluting my lungs checking the weather and one of the officers came pulling into the back parking lot, trunk lid swinging wildly. So, laughing, I go to check and see why on earth he is driving around with his trunk open. Turns out, he had been with a group of minors and confiscated their beer, put it into the trunk and didn't get it securely latched. So he comes out of the car, grabs the beer out of the trunk and yells, "I almost lost my beer!" I laughed! One of the only jobs I know where you have to be worried about your beer falling out of your trunk! (Ok, ok, besides beer delivery guy).
Also, one of the narcotics detectives was upset the other day because he was logging evidence in and spilled. What did he spill? Not drugs. He was upset because he spilled "bong water" all over and now stunk badly. Occupational hazard day apparently. I think he even said, "Dude, I spilled my bong water all over everything!"
Do you suppose those officers ever imagined that someday they would be hard at work, getting paid and say things like "I almost lost my beer" or "I spilled my bong water"? What a great job to have!
Of course, weird things come out of my mouth all the time dispatching. Things like, I killed 2 today, you get number 3.
Ok, let me explain that. Gruesome as it sounds, deaths always seem to happen in 3's. In fact, I worked one 5 day week that I killed off 9 poor souls (not personally, they just happened to die while I was on the other end of the phone.) Whether it be natural causes, accidents, whatever.. they always happen in 3's. Just like the 3 days leading up to the full moon are probably the 3 busiest days of the month. An increase in ambulance calls for seizures, DUI's, drunks fighting, bar fights, and the calls just seem to get crazier. I should keep track of my blogs and see which crazy calls were around the full moon. I bet there would be a pattern.
So back to calls for today, we occasionally deal with people we refer to as slow learners. They are different from the general stupid questions we get on a daily basis. These people, for whatever reason, do not understand the concept of if you break the law you go to jail. Ex-boyfriend and ex-girlfriend have an argument, one calls the police and the other is given a no trespass order. Basically, girl can't go over to boy's house anymore, by order of the police, and if she does, she will be arrested for something like failure to obey a lawful command. (Hey, I work nights, I have lots of time to ask questions of my officers). So, the next night girl goes to boy's house. Boy calls the police and girl goes to jail, where in order to bond out of jail, she receives a no contact order from the judge. Now, not only can she not go to boy's house, but she cannot call boy, cannot talk to boy in public, cannot send him letters, have friends call, etc, until she goes to court. Seems simple enough - if you see or hear boy, RUN!!! Two days later, girl goes back to boy's house. By now, you should be able to guess what happens. Girl comes back to jail and her bond is revoked - she sits in jail until she goes to court. See what I mean by slow learner!!
That's all for now, but it is Saturday night, and I have 5 hours left to go. You may be getting more later.
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| | Posted 8/31/2008 12:46 AM - 52 Views - 2 eProps - 0 comments
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